Bedrest and baby kicks

Husband-and-wife journalists Bob Miller and Callie Clark Miller use this space to offer their views on everyday issues.

SHE SAID: If you wanted to read about the most boring week in history, here it is. Because there is no activity more boring than bed rest. This week, little 3.5-pound unborn Dawson Christopher Miller and I discovered just how bad daytime TV is. Let's just say I've been watching a lot of TLC and those reality crime shows, also quite a bit of Animal Planet.

Did you know tigers make a noise through their nose called chuffing when they're seeking out friendly contact with you? My cat makes a similar noise right before she coughs up a hairball.

Bed rest. I bet it sounds heavenly to some of you. Getting to sit on your tail all day, watching TV, reading, learning a second language, making sock puppets. I once saw this rerun of "Everybody Loves Raymond" (which comes on surprisingly frequently on a variety of channels throughout the day, by the way) in which Deborah told Raymond he didn't have to worry about getting his dad a birthday present for an entire year. You don't understand at all, Raymond responded, it's that I have an ENTIRE YEAR to worry.

That's the way bed rest is. It's not a vacation, it's hours on end for me to worry about the reason I'm on my tail in the first place: this little world-class soccer player inside me. At our regular doctor's appointment last Friday, we learned Dawson wasn't doing quite as well as everyone involved would like. He's small, for one thing — about 86 percent of babies his gestational age are larger. Not growing as well as he should be could mean he's not getting enough nutrients or blood flow. And I'm showing signs of what my doc calls "threatened" preterm labor.

So basically, like his momma, Dawson is small but has little patience when it comes to making his big debut (ask Bob how patient a person I am).

At first, we thought I'd just be on bed rest for a week. At a follow-up doctor's appointment, we learned I'd be out for the duration of my pregnancy, which may not be quite as long as we all thought if Dawson isn't thriving in utero.

It's a scary situation, made scarier by all the free time I now have to ponder the unending list of things that could go wrong (or are going wrong at this very moment).

Much like this school of dolphins that swam around a stranded family in the ocean for hours to protect them from sharks (see "Saved by Dolphins" on Animal Planet; I'm sure there'll be a rerun), Bob is circling the wagons, trying to balance his own job with a long list of regular household chores and also preparations for Dawson's potentially earlier-than-expected appearance.

HE SAID: I haven't been spending as much time in the office lately.

There's so much to be done at home, that my "extra" time at work has transformed into required time preparing for my second son.

First, there's all the doctor's appointments. Once a week now for Callie and Dawson, with the occasional ultrasound appointment. Last week, we visited Dawson's pediatrician for the first time.

All of the extra running around keeps me busy, but it makes pregnancy all the more exciting. My anticipation grows each and every day.

Last week's news about Dawson's somewhat stunted growth has added a little more anxiety to the anticipation, but I can't say the news wasn't expected. Callie has never had much luck with health issues.

I feel like this is a great learning experience for me, however. I have always prided myself on my work — and sometimes defined myself by it — but the news last week forced me to re-evaluate my role as a man, a father, husband and worker.

As I've grown older, I feel like I've discovered and embraced my responsibilities. Right now, they include taking care of my cute and talented wife, who is on bed rest.

Callie and Dawson are priority No. 1. That includes taking on the laundry and dishes duties, the housecleaning, shopping and cooking. And I still have a lot of handiwork upstairs to finish before the nursery is ready. But things could be so much worse. And a big reason they're not worse is that the folks here at work have been so supportive. Some of my colleagues have taken up the slack. I haven't heard any grumblings about the managing editor being out of pocket more than normal.

The good folks in our IT department have set Callie up with a laptop and software so she can do a lot of work from home until after the baby's born. My bosses have been accommodating beyond words.

It's a good time to work for a family-run newspaper. My bosses understand the value of hard work, but they also understand the importance of family. In my professional life, I've always thought my extra-effort, blue-collar mentality has compensated for many other shortcomings. It's that way in my personal life, too, although I must say I've been a much lazier husband than newspaper man. That's changing now. It's past 5:30 p.m., and I've got a million more things to do at the office. It's time to get back home now. My little boy depends on it.

Callie Clark Miller is the outsourced special publications managing editor for the Southeast Missourian, who's bored out of her mind. Bob Miller is the Southeast Missourian managing editor, among other things. Reach them at cmiller@semissourian.com and bmiller@semissourian.com.