It takes more than a quick tongue to be an auctioneer.
You have to have some serious selling savvy to peddle a homemade jar of pickles for $24.
Eighty-five auctioneers from all over the state were in Cape Girardeau Saturday, the second of the three-day Missouri Professional Auctioneers Association annual conference.
Saturday night, a crowd of about 100 met at Barks Auctioneer barn near the Interstate 55 and Highway 61 junction to have a little fun.
Among the events at Saturday night's festivities was an "old-timers" auction contest for auctioneers 60 years and older.
Claueda Barks, who helped organize the event, was a bit hesitant in admitting that she belonged with the "old timers," but she won the braggin' rights over her male competitors.
Barks, along with the other candidates, showed the qualities that make auctioneers different from other salesmen.
Scott Musser, the director of the National Auctioneers Association and an international auctioneer contest winner, found himself judging the old timers in Barks' barn Saturday night, far away from his home in Kennewick, Wash.
Perfecting the craft
Musser said there are three areas that auctioneers work on in trying to perfect their craft. First, there is stage presence and poise during the introduction. Then there is eye contact and body language. Then, of course, there is the cadence, the familiar rhythm of the auctioneers' calls.
"There is the speed component," Musser said. "It can't be too slow or too fast. Then there's the rhythm -- can you tap your toe to it? And then there's clarity, one of the most important components, especially when you're dealing with the public. The auctioneers can understand everything that's being said, but if your customers can't understand anything, you're not going to sell anything."
The nuances are difficult to pick up for a layman, but the auctioneers know a good auctioneer when they see and hear one.
To get started, an auctioneer goes to school for two weeks.
"It takes two weeks to lay the foundation," Musser said. "It takes a lifetime to learn."
The old-timers competition was one of many activities that has been planned this weekend. The auctioneers have been learning about technology, sharing tips and generally having a good time.
"I've been in the auction business 43 years and haven't missed a convention in 30 years," said Glenn Binger of Blue Springs, Mo. "I learn something every time I come, whether it's from the seminar or talking to other auctioneers. Plus, the fellowship. And once in a while they'll have some good coconut cream pie."
When the old-timers contest was over, Bobby Barks -- Claueda's husband -- was recognized as being a past president of the MPAA and was given a belt buckle.
After that, some other members of the MPAA took the microphone and stole the show.
MPAA president Ed Stanger sold his famous pickles. The bidding got competitive, and the bidders were laughing at themselves for bidding so high.
After he sold his first jar, he did what any savvy, pickle-peddling auctioneer would do.
He pulled out two more.
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