Zapping squirrels

JOE SULLIVAN, I can so relate to your Friday column about the squirrels. Anyone who feeds birds knows the feeling. My late husband did rig up a shocking device. It was low voltage and wired to the bird feeder pole, and right under the feeder he put metal spokes all around. They could climb up the pole just fine, but when they reached up and got hold of a spoke, ZAP! It didn't hurt them, just gave them such a jolt they never came back. They would leap off and hit the ground running. If I knew how he did it I would send you instructions, but I'll bet you probably know someone who could fix you one. It sure worked for us.

Brunt of defense

ONLY 37 percent of all Marines and 45 percent of all Army soldiers have deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan. Yet 60 percent of the National Guard force has deployed. Our National Guard also responds to natural disasters. Thank you to all of our proud and honorable National Guardsmen and women for continuing to shoulder the brunt of our nation's defense.

Futile arguments

THIS IS in response to the person who compared Missouri's gasoline tax to the tax paid in Germany, as well as others who are constantly trying to compare two situations to make a point. Simply put, this is an apples and oranges situation and just doesn't compute. You cannot logically pull out one statistics from a large network and say it's valid. These kinds of out-of-context types of arguments are futile and do nothing to clarify the issue.

Insidious disgrace

COLUMNIST MICHELLE Malkin's anecdotal "evidence" used to undermine President Bush's reasonable immigration bill was an insidious disgrace unparalleled in the history of journalism.

Reporting crimes

FAILURE TO report a crime in most cases is not against the law in Missouri. Some states have good Samaritan statutes, but Missouri doesn't.

Libertarian line

COLUMNIST CAL Thomas's invocation of Calvin Coolidge to extol the virtues of a rugged individualist society in favor of one based on cooperation and working together as communities will likely fall on deaf ears, with the exception of those who labor in think tanks as libertarian apologists.

Headed for relic status

IF PRESIDENT Bush doesn't lead the effort to extricate us from Iraq well before next year's elections, the Republican Party will find itself relegated to relic status.

On Eagle's Pings

The following may blow you away.

Cape's downtown golf course deserves an A.

It should be on the tour, PGA.

Playing a few holes will make your day.

Euphemistic legislation

ONE OF my all-time favorite euphemisms for the name of a law passed by Congress was the act requiring that Japanese-Americans be sent to internment camps. The law was passed by Congress in 1942 and named the Japanese Family Leave Act.

Moderate benefits

THE PERSON who couldn't think of one good reason for consumption of beer or wine must be from another planet. Moderate consumption of alcohol has been scientifically proven to be good for your health. Moderate consumers live longer than excessive drinkers and abstainers.

Eyesore is gone

MY HAT'S off to the members of the First Presbyterian Church of Jackson who cleaned up a weedy eyesore across from Sunset Hills on U.S. 61. Thanks.

Do the right thing

I FAVOR the common-sense compromise immigration bill. I'm tired of posturing polls and talk-radio propagandists pandering to nativists and xenophobes. I urge our representatives and senators to back President Bush's proposal and do the right thing.

Long time coming

I SAY that it is about time Missouri public employees have the same constitutional right that their counterparts have in almost every other state, the right to collectively bargain. The past 60 years have proven that without this right public employees in Missouri have been paid some of the lowest wages in the country. I hear that legislators in Jefferson City are outraged, but that is because their funding and backing comes from the bodies that will have to start paying their employees properly. This has been a long time in the coming, and if it is overturned I will soon look at moving out of this one-sided state.

Private prayer

GARY RUST'S contention that removing prayer from public schools is the root of all evil makes it obvious that he has failed to read what Jesus said about prayer. "When you pray, go to your inner room, close the door and pray to your Father in secret." He believed public prayer to be hypocritical. The myth that lack of prayer is the cause of our social problems is a naive right-wing cop-out.

Construction first

A RECENT issue of the Chronicle of Higher Education listed Southeast Missouri State University football as one of the Division I sports teams that has a woeful graduation rate and must give up some scholarships. It is not the fault of coaches but a SEMO leadership that created a culture which places building construction above academic programs.

Something to do

GIVE CHILDREN something to do and a place to do it. A water park would be perfect. The one at Farmington is always full, and Farmington is not as big and the Cape Girardeau-Jackson area.

Economic voters

I FOUND it interesting that the 100 poorest counties in the United States were located in red states. Doesn't this say something about economics being a voting force?

Dangerous path

DEMOCRATS ARE heading down a dangerous path. They promised to end the Iraq war but instead issued another blank check. Democrats promised to end corruption, but Congressman Jefferson of Louisiana was indicted on corruption and bribery charges with a possible sentence of 200 years. Democrats promised to end earmarks for pet projects but have decided to hide all earmarks until September.