Belief, faith remain heart of budding organization

When Pastor Tommy Weems advised Nolan Weber and his family to "stop hoping, stop wishing and start believing," his father Dean spent the next day with a magic marker, tagging every mirror and pane of glass in the house with the word "believe."

"Even the fish tank had it written across there," Dean said. "I wanted that message to be the first thing we all saw when we woke up and the last thing we saw before we went to sleep."

At the time, Nolan was battling brain cancer. After he died in December, Dean, Rachelle and Nolan's younger brother, Colten, decided to start a foundation in his honor to help other local families who've suffered as they had.

Dean and Rachelle Weber, in matching "God's got this" T-shirts, sit in a living room still dotted with the sentiment. It's no longer inked on the windows, but a sculpture on the hearth, banners on the wall and ornaments on the coffee table all remind them: "believe."

To hear them tell it, it seems Dean and Rachelle needed the reminders more than their son did. By all accounts, believing came as naturally to Nolan as soccer, baseball or even ping-pong. His staid faith served to inspire not only his family, but nearly everyone he encountered during his ordeal.

Rachelle Weber, Nolan's mother, addresses the crowd Sept. 13 before the start of the first Nolan Weber Believers 5k and Fun Run in Jackson. (GLENN LANDBERG)

"That's one of the reasons we decided to call [the foundation] 'Believing Beyond,'" Rachelle said.

She explained they didn't want to talk to Nolan about any plans that didn't include a full recovery, but the times they did, "the only thing we were ever able to get out of him was [a desire] to make it easier for other families."

Her voice wavers at the thought of Nolan's selflessness, and she takes a second to dry her eyes. It's obvious the pain is still there. The Webers know it won't go away, either. But to them, that pain is motivation; it compels them to do everything in their power to ease the paths of others.

"We knew a family who had a child with cancer [before Nolan[']s diagnosis] and you feel for them, definitely, but at the end of the day, you can sort of turn it off," Dean said. "But when it's your child or your brother, you can't turn it off. That struggle is always there, and you can never take that burden completely off of someone, but you can help."

The Webers remember the unsolicited support their community offered them and how it helped. Things such as groceries or the still-unknown person who paid their electric bill one month -- those experiences helped them develop a mission statement for their soon-to-be 501(c)3; namely, to help families where they need it.

Colten Weber stands covered in whipped cream after completing the 5k in his brother's honor, the Nolan Weber Believers 5k and Fun Run in Jackson, on Sept. 13. Participants could donate money to childhood cancer and receive a plate full of whipped cream to plant on someone. (GLENN LANDBERG)

"And you can't wait for people to ask for help. I've heard people say, 'Oh no, we're fine.'" Rachelle said. From her own experience and from those of other "mom-cologists," she knows that just the realization that they're not forgotten makes a world of difference. "Ask first, but they're not fine. Even if they say they are, you have to do something."

"Whether it's gas cards to help them get to treatment, paying bills, or something for a sibling so that they don't get sidelined. It's not just about seeking out these families and helping them financially," Dean added. "We want to pray with these families."

He says that in his opinion, if you've lost your hope, you've lost everything, and that sometimes trusting God is all you can do. A lifelong Baptist, Dean says he has realized what it really means to put all one's trust in God.

"I know God could have cured Nolan in the blink of an eye," he said. "He had other plans for Nolan, but I really don't think God is done with him yet."

The Webers believe that the foundation is part of the fulfillment of God's plan.

"That's what we're trying to do."

Through that foundation, they say their other priority is raising childhood cancer awareness in the local community.

"When a child dies of cancer, they lose an average of 64 years, as opposed to an adult losing an average of 15," Rachelle says. "What's sad is that they lose their entire future. It's not OK."

But childhood cancer, for some reason, often gets overlooked, the Webers said.

"I'd say that as much as anybody else, we went through life with blinders on to a certain extent," Dean said.

"When your child's OK, it's really not something that people want to think about," Rachelle said. Dean nods in agreement. "But it's right here in our community."

To raise awareness as well as money to help local families, Believing Beyond staged its first big event in September, the Nolan Weber Believers 5k Fun Run, in which more than 300 people participated. They hope to do it bigger and better next year so they can do more for local families. A soccer tournament, baseball tourney and ping-pong competition are also in the future plans.

The Webers also recently spoke to the Redhawks football team at Southeast Missouri State University to remind them not to take things for granted. Dean and Rachelle have been open and approachable about their experience and were more than happy to do it. "Planting seeds," Rachelle calls it.

"I hope that God continues to put these opportunities before us," Dean said. "We believe that everything will be explained one day and we'll be with Nolan again. But until that time, we believe He wants to use our foundation to spread His message and we trust Him completely."

tgraef@semissourian.com