** Texting, pants

It is time for the city of Cape to pass a couple new ordinances. (1) We should impose a no texting while driving for every age driver, including police officers. (2) We should also impose an ordinance about sagging pants.

** End of times

The sound on my TV went out recently and hasn't returned despite heroic efforts to fix it. I feel like I've returned to a state of nature or that this signals the beginning of the biblical or zombie apocalypse.

** Athletic record

Examine the Alnutt-Dobbins record at SEMO. This year seven teams had losing seasons. Only baseball, soccer and track had winning seasons. Another NCAA investigation. Three former head coaches file lawsuit. And they spent over $300,000 to buy out coaches' contracts.