Lessons from Venus

When you have spent about two decades following her career, cheering her on in front of a television screen, and admiring the class with which she experiences victory and defeat, the only thing that would be better than seeing Venus Williams live would be meeting her and shaking her hand. I didn't have the opportunity to get close enough to shake her hand or meet her, but I did have up-close seats when she came to the Show Me Center last Thursday for the Southeast Missouri State Speakers Series event called "An Evening with Venus Williams."

Everyone who pays attention to women's tennis knows the sisters, Venus and her superstar sister, Serena, are vastly different in demeanor. Serena is the more expressive Williams, wearing her emotions on her sleeve. Venus is, ironically, the more ... well, serene sister. She has an obvious passion for winning, but she's a quieter spirit than her younger sister. I wondered, therefore, what this evening would be like as she emerged to address a crowd. I looked forward to seeing her off the court -- this woman who is one part of the duo who won my enthusiasm for women's tennis, even led me to take lessons many moons ago.

Venus did not disappoint. She was both funny and full of life-lessons. Her sit-down interview with moderator Brooke Clubbs provided many takeaways from which to draw inspiration, in addition to knowledge. I was especially glad to see the young people in attendance, all soaking up Ms. Williams' words, but words to the wise are for all, so I and the many adults present soaked it up also.

Venus discussed that from Day 1, her purpose was spoken over her. Her father, Richard Williams, would tell her and Serena that they would one day be numbers one and two in the world. This is what I call speaking life. Venus said, perhaps only half-joking, that her parents "brainwashed" them. Thus, she never thought about tennis from the onset as some may have thought of it. "I was on autopilot," she said.

As she got older, of course, she grew in intentionality and fire. "You have to want it," she said. Having such a tough competitor for a sister helped. She described Serena, who gave birth to her first child this month, as "fearless, relentless." She watched those qualities in Serena and honed them in herself.

Venus explained the effort it takes not to get burned out, even when doing something she loves. She attributed her career longevity to a balanced life and taking time for herself. She stressed that "you have to have love. You have to love it," but she also values balance. "I have to have a balanced life if I want to be my best," she shared. Much of that balance is centered around her family, whom she said is "definitely a huge priority."

When asked her about retirement, she pointed out that walking away from one's dream tends to remind people how "amazing it is to live your dream." Many, therefore, return. She does not have plans to come back once she retires, however, and did not sound like she is ready to retire.

Venus's list of accomplishments go beyond tennis. There's always been much more to both sisters than tennis; their parents made sure of that. Venus is a fashion designer, an author and an entrepreneur, and she expects to continue running her business and working with charities when tennis is eventually behind her. "You can't box yourself in just because society wants you to," she said.

Venus is credited with leveling the financial playing field between men and women's tennis players, with the women now making as much as the men. The legendary "Billie Jean King started it," the moderator said, "but you finished it." It was not something Venus set out to do, but when she found herself in the position to be a voice, she said she had to be that voice. Generations of athletes will thank her.

Venus remains driven to progress. "It's always about going further," she said, before adding that her tombstone will read, "She never peaked." Why? Because "peaked" means you're done, and there's no point in being alive if you're done, she explained.

The seven-time Grand Slam champion discussed the theimportant role confidence plays success. "Always bet on yourself. Always believe in yourself" -- even when you don't feel confident. "I take actions as if I feel like I'm on top of the world," she said, advising, "Fake it till you make it."

Though she hates to lose, Venus admitted that even those moments are "defining moments." They give an opportunity to "reinvent myself," said Venus.

The icon had advice for the young people in the arena as they pursue their dreams. She told them to create a game plan and write down goals. "When you write it down, it becomes real," she quoted her father. She also understands one cannot always listen to others' criticism. "Drown out all the other voices, and know your own voice."

Even with more successes than most of us can imagine for ourselves, Venus is not yet done. She has not peaked. She is committed to having more influence, to helping others. This, she said, is not only her mission. "I was meant to play this game," she asserted, but "to help other people is all our calling." And as she reflected on her life, her storied career, the mark she has already left, Venus said, "I can do more. I can do more."

As always, I was inspired by Venus, and I believe her. She will do more -- and I will be watching.

Adrienne Ross is owner of Adrienne Ross Communications and a former Southeast Missourian editorial board member. Contact her at aross@semissourian.com.