FROM BEING A FOUNTAIN 'STATUE' TO DANCING IN A FLOWER BED, PAGE EXPERIENCE WAS FUN

The trademark of Washington, D.C. is politics. That's rightly so; everyone in DC has an agenda. Once I was caught in a staff elevator with two guys in suits who looked about my age.

"So what brings you to Washington?" I asked.

"We are lobbing Congress to make the Everglades a national park which would stop their destruction."

"Oh, that's a . . . noble pursuit. Uh, I think this is my floor. Good luck." Whew!

The Democratic Reception Room where all the lobbyists loitered was a circus; they were worse than the media.

Once I saw one of the Democrats throw his arm around the shoulder of one of the Republicans as they walked out of the chamber. Mr. Zigglar, who was standing next to me said, "Watch out for those knives."

"What?" I said.

"That's what you call comity."

"Comedy?" I repeated rather confused.

"No, comity. Comity is when you act friendly to someone who you don't feel amenable toward. When Senators from different sides address each other as, 'My esteemed colleague from New Hampshire,' or, 'My friend from South Dakota,' they are using comity. This keeps the Senate cordial because Senators aren't lowering themselves to insult one another. If they went around saying, 'You idiot, how could you think that,' it would avail nothing. Remember this is the United States Senate where everyone's opinion is respected."

Some of the Senators genuinely like each other, but they are so good at comity it's hard to tell the difference between it and honest friendship. There are groups of Senators that like each other and groups that don't like other groups. They move in cliques, much like the cliques in high school. I was very surprised to see this.

One of the highlights of my trip was Independence Day. A few other pages and I went to the Mall to enjoy "A Capitol Fourth." It was very hot, so hot that I was finally overcome with the temptation to jump into a fountain to cool off. I figured that the higher I climbed up the fountain the cleaner the water would be. So, there I was 10 feet above street level, enjoying the mist. It was night and the fountain was lit from the inside. Looking back I'm surprised I didn't get electrocuted. Suddenly a thought crossed my mind, from street level I was just a silhouette. I decided to play this up, feet together, raising my hands palms upward to the sky; there I stood, a perfectly formed statue. The people walking by started taking pictures of me. I heard them murmuring, "Hey, that's really someone up there." After half an hour there were about 30 other people in the fountain. Well, that was it. It got crowded, so I got out.

During the celebration a few of us got split up from the group so what was left went down to the west lawn of the Capitol. There was a big crowd watching and listening to bands on stage outside the capitol and we could not find a place to sit down. I spied this huge grate in the middle of a flower bed unoccupied, so we sat down. We chilled there enjoying the music when a tribute to Louie Armstrong started playing. The cute guy from Las Vegas raised one eyebrow and asked casually, "Do you dance?" I smiled and said, "Yeah, what da you know?" He said, "Well, this sounds like swing music." More interested I said, "Yeah, west or east?" "West." "Get up and show me. " He got up, did a basic step and I was in his arms. We were swing dancing in the middle of a flower bed on the Capitol lawn. It was the only space available to dance. The music was great, but we danced clumsily. It probably didn't help that we were dancing in sand and trying to avoid flowers. When the song was over and we were both breathing hard everyone within 50 feet started applauding us. They thought we were part of the stage; our friends were like, "That was so cool, you have to teach me how to do that!" But the music was over.

Now I've told you a few of my experiences in D.C. I hope they've brought you a little humor and a little insight into the life of a page. Let me encourage any younger people reading this to find out more about the program if it interests you. Write or e-mail Senator Bond. This is something you don't want to miss.

I'll leave you with my favorite quote, from Senator Byrd, the Senate historian. During one day the Senate was out, he came to the cloak room just to talk to the pages. He told us about life and Congress. For two hours he sat with us, and we talked and laughed and listened. The last thing he said to us was, "Just remember no game, no sports match has ever changed the course of history. It's important to stay fit, but before you worry about your body, strengthen your mind, because that's where the fate of a nation lies."