LETTERS: TRIBUTE TO FATHER DARLING

To the editor:

I was touched by Peter Kinder's article June 1 on the life of Dr. Raymond Ritter Sr. I watched the mourners streaming out of the Presbyterian church and felt as if I left too many words unspoken to him. Dr. Ritter and I shared a love of local history and genealogy since my arrival in Cape Girardeau in 1991. He and his daughter-in-law, Ann, and I shared a passion last year in the survival of a local landmark, the former St. Vincent's seminary.

I have been following the Southeast Missourian's coverage of Random Acts of Kindness Week. Sometimes I wondered about the psychology of making public what should be practiced every day in our lives on a more silent level. Yet here I stand regretting I did not call or look Dr. Ritter up and thank him personally for all he has done and shared with me. Oh, I did thank him each time I met him, yet I did not go out of my way to send a note or a follow-up telephone call thanking him for the time he always managed to share. Like so many other across Southeast Missouri and Southern Illinois, I watched from afar and didn't now what to say to console the family or ourselves.

I have always held firm the idea our friends and family are quilt blocks meticulously sewn together by a single, fine thread. The thread is us. Over the span of our lives we do not replace the blocks but continuously add until the product is finished. At the time of our death the quilt is complete. People come together to share what they celebrated with us during the formation of each square, whether it is a schoolteacher, our first date, children or a very good friend. Dr. Ritter is one of the squares in my patchwork quilt. I thank him for making it a very vivid memory and chuckle aloud.

In keeping with my thoughts on Random Acts of Kindness Week, I would like to challenge all of you to extend yourselves briefly and thank someone who had much to do with the establishment of black education and the black Catholicism movement in Cape Girardeau almost 50 years ago. I have interviewed, share a friendship with and highly respect the Rev. Willis Frederick "Gus" Darling. He came to St. Vincent's Seminary the Christmas after completing his eighth-grade education. Times were hard, as he was one of six children. His family migrated between various farm and carpentry jobs to make ends meet.

Farther Darling returned to Cape Girardeau, serving from 1933 to 1944. He was associate pastor at Old St. Vincent's Church and lived at the seminary teaching classes in math, Greek and French. Here he established Holy Family Catholic Church and school, the first black school and Catholic church in the area serving 1,100 families in the old Smelterville-to-Marble Heights area on the railroad.

Some of the black children taking instruction for first communion from Father Darling told him if they had their own church, they would attract many more minority families. What sounds like our own version of the popular movie "Field of Dreams" happened here.

Father Darling went to the higher powers and convinced them of the need. Once that was done, he appealed to the community. Ed Haus donated the money to get started. The nuns at St. Francis Hospital donated altar cloths, and several prominent families donated stations of the cross and other items. The Rural Life Committee donated building supplies. Darling appealed to the board at St. Mary's Cemetery for land for his church to use in the burials of their loved ones.

Father Darling's enthusiasm for life and his ability to live his faith has been admired by many from afar. What he has given the people in Southeast Missouri cannot ever be measured. As I stand in a moment of silence for Dr. Ritter, I am reminded that life is indeed too short, and I need to do my random act of kindness and drop Father Darling a note in the mail and tell him thank you. Thank you for what you did to improve the education and religious needs of families otherwise overlooked. Thank you for not brushing off the requests of area children for their own church and school. Thank you for not thinking it too big a process for one man. Thank you for being my friend and a friend to every other human being.

I challenge you to take five minutes and drop a note to the Rev. W. Darling C.M, St. Mary's of the Barrens, 1701 W. St. Joseph St., Perryville, Mo., 63775. And, as a religious friend of mine says, fight the good fight.

DIANA STEELE

Cape Girardeau