Since Sept. 11 parents have been forced to walk a fine line between scaring their children and speaking frankly with them about terrorism, said a panel Tuesday evening.

The six-member group met with several community members during a program at Southeast Missouri Hospital.

Dr. Paul Caruso, a pediatric specialist, said questions from young people about serious issues shouldn't be dismissed, but children should be reassured that they are safe.

"There are bad people who do bad things, but there are more good people," he said he explained to children.

Though six months have passed since the terrorist attacks, some children and teen-agers are still seeing the effects as family members are shipped off to war, said Mary Burton, director of the American Red Cross' Southeast Missouri chapter.

Children and adolescents "have a tendency to personalize everything," said Danny Johnson of the New Vision Counseling center. As long as they know their own world hasn't shifted dramatically, they're OK, he said.

Cape Girardeau police Sgt. Barry Hovis, a former school resource officer, concurred. He said school violence seems to have far more resonance with youth because it affects people just like them.

For those who do experience anxiety about terrorism, information and reassurance are key, panelists agreed.

"It's always important to have an open relationship," Caruso said. "Answer any questions a kid has."

Another way to alleviate fears is to plan for emergencies, he said.

Burton agreed. Family emergency plans not only help adults prepare for the worst, but they give children sense of control and security if they have an idea about what to do in an emergency, she said.

It helps to establish a plan of action, she said, even if it's just a common meeting ground or a phone number everyone in the family commits to memory.

Mary Lou Bass, a counselor at Jefferson Elementary School, said she never thought about a family emergency plan until her grandson was visiting and pointed out safety deficiencies in her home.

"Here I was encouraging all my kids to have a plan, and I didn't have one," she said.

The program was sponsored by the hospital's Generations Center, Community Caring Council, Cape Girardeau Public Schools and Cape County Mental Health Board.

abuchanan@semissourian.com

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