The 10-Minute Interview- Delirious is as Delirious does

Delirious is that guy you don't want to meet in a dark alley.

Just look at him. He's a disturbed, demonic masked hellion who doesn't make a sound unless to speak in tongues. And even though he wins -- and wins a lot -- he's the wrestler your mother would've warn you about.

He's Hunter Johnston's kind of guy.

Johnston is the day-to-day Southeast Missouri State University student who has become so adept at transforming his own slasher-flick-loving, heavy-metal-inspired personality into Delirious that he was chosen by a popular radio show as the St. Louis region's No. 1 wrestler last year. He'll bring his Satanic alter-ego into a Cape Girardeau wrestling ring today to face Kid Cash in Gateway Championship Wrestling's "No Pain, No Gain" main event.

Johnston, a 22-year-old Cape Girardeau native, found success as Delirious when he won his pro debut with GCW in July 2001. Since then he's wrestled throughout the Midwest and gained notoriety as one of the most recognized and most despised characters on the independent circuits. His chance to take a career move comes Feb. 19 in a tryout match on an NWA-TNA pay-per-view event.

Think pro wrestlers aren't athletes? Tell him that tonight.

Until then, meet Hunter Johnston.What are the chances you could kick my ass?

It would depend on rules. Under pro wrestling rules, I could probably kick your butt. Under street-fight rules, who knows?Thanks ... I think. I'm sure you're just being kind. Would you fight dirty?

Without a doubt.Do people challenge you to fights when they find out you're a wrestler?

It's never happened. I try to keep a low profile when it comes to that. I never make it a point to tell somebody, "Hey, I'm a wrestler."Who's your favorite masked man?

Michael Myers from "Halloween." I grew up on Mike Myers and Jason. Mom would put those movies in the VCR when she'd go out and I'd sit there and watch every minute.So she was trying to warp you at a young age.

There's no real explanation for it. Instead of Care Bears and G.I. Joe, she'd put on horror movies. For my eighth birthday, my cake had Michael Myers holding a knife. I have the pictures to prove it.Do chicks dig the mask?

Yeah, I'd guess they do, but I've never met too many chicks when I'm wearing the mask. I don't usually wear the outfit into clubs.What's the worst wrestling character you've seen?

A lot of the ones that are bad are actually ingenious. The more stupid the better. As for the worst ones, there are a lot of bad ones. I'm a fan of the bad ones, really. Doink the Clown was classic. The Repo Man, The Million Dollar Man, they're good ones.Are there times you can't get the Prince song "Delirious" out of your head?

I've never even heard it. People have told me about it. I've seen the Eddie Murphy stand-up special "Delirious."People who can't get that song out of their mind will blame you for it.

I sure hope so.Your theme song must be a little, um, extreme.

It's black metal. "Hybrid Stigmata" by Dimnu Borgir. It's a good song. The opening fits perfectly.So no Cher CDs in your car then, I guess.

No, but a lot of Frank Sinatra, believe it or not. Bob Marley. Those guys are great. I like "Come Fly With Me," "Embraceable You," all of them.What are you afraid of?

I'm afraid that one day I'll wake up and all my knowledge of everything will be gone. I'll be a vegetable. I'm afraid of losing my sense and going totally crazy. That's scary.Are you a tough guy?

No, unless I'm crossed. I'm not a bad guy. I've never been in a fight in my life, besides grade-school pushing and shoving. I've never been punched or been punched. I've never been punished, never been grounded. No spankings, no paddlings. Nothing.How did you avoid that?

I had a big mouth, which actually got me out of most situations. I can usually talk my way out of it. I was a class clown, especially in grade school. Does it help calm your nerves to imagine everybody in the audience in their underwear?

I'm in such a zone I don't even notice any people. I don't even realize it. Having more people makes it easier because a bigger crowd gets me more pumped up. My best friend could sit in the front row and I'd never notice him.Has Mom seen you wrestle?

One time. She hates it. She says I'll break my neck, all the stuff a mom worries about. She likes the character, but she tells me I'll regret doing this. She says all the stuff a good mom would tell her son.I'll give you two sets of names and you tell me which you'd most like to piledrive into a table. First up: Madonna or Brittney Spears.

Brittney Spears. I don't think she's really that talented. I think anybody could do what she does given the time and training.Gilligan or the Skipper?

I'd have to say the Skipper. His hair-brain ideas were ridiculous. I have respect for Bob Denver.George Bush or Bill Clinton?

I don't agree with either. It'd be a simultaneous move on 'em both, or one right after the other.What's your dream vacation?

My No. 1 goal is to go to Japan and wrestle and make it there. There are so many opportunities there for wrestlers my size. But if it was a non-wrestling vacation, I'd be going to Jamaica.What movie have you seen more than anything?

"The Toxic Avenger." It's corny, hokey, violent. Everything about it is my kind of movie. It's not serious in the slightest way. Even the violence has humor in it. I could see myself getting killed in a movie like that. It'd be a blast.Any movies you can't wait to go see?

"Freddy vs. Jason" comes out in July. I'm looking forward to that. I'll be rooting for Jason: He's cold, calculated and doesn't have to speak to get the job done. As for right now, nothing's out now that makes me want to buy a ticket. The Matrix sequels should be OK.Not even J-Lo's new movie?

Uh, no.

jhall@semissourian.com

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