At least, not if I can help it. Besides, it's a great election-year promise any politician can make. Golfers always vote, you know.

Serious golfers have had a good winter. It's been warm enough to play most of the time. And with the arrival this week of balmy (is that humidity in the air?) temperatures, golfing fever has come upon us like a plague.

Some of us, however, have had more serious tasks during the so-called cold months. These are the months when, during the dark evenings of daylight-savingless time, you have more hours to while away with pursuits other than golf. Perhaps you read more during the winter. Or work in your basement shop. Or watch more TV. Or sleep in the recliner. You know what you do.

Me?

I have taken advantage of these cloudy weeks to apply myself to the self-appointed chore of refining the Grand and Wonderful Plan for the downtown golf course.

Remember?

Last year I suggested that some of the park around the Common Pleas Courthouse be set aside for a golf course. This is needed, of course, because Cape Girardeau continues to look for a magnet to draw visitors to our fair city. I can't think of anything that would be a bigger draw than a first-rate golf course on the terraced banks of the courthouse hill.

The view. The challenge. The accessibility. This golf course will have it all.

Consider the view. There is the mighty Mississippi River in plain sight from atop the No. 1 tee. In fact, this is one of the few places in town where the river is so viewable. The panorama extends from the bend near Cape Rock Park to the north all the way past the bridges, new and old, to the south. And don't forget the unparalleled vistas of Southern Illinois and the Shawnee National Forest to the east. The views on this golf course will be first class.

There will, of course, be special challenges. There are the rooftops of downtown buildings to consider. And no one has ever played a water hazard quite like the Mississippi. Which is why I think the plan for a floating green on a barge in the river is such a compelling idea. The fairways, naturally, will be extremely narrow in order to preserve the maturing trees sprinkled throughout the courthouse park. But if the course is extended, as previously suggested, to include all that vacant area just north of downtown, there could be some easier holes.

Accessibility? In my never-ending quest to do something about lunchtime traffic -- you know, the congestion that comes when everybody downtown goes way out west to eat lunch while everyone around the mall heads for downtown, I am convinced that having a championship golf course downtown will be a tremendous factor in keeping more people out of their cars and on a golf cart.

I don't have a crystal ball, of course, so I don't know if the city's thoroughfares can handle all the traffic from the west trying to get downtown to the golf course. That's something to work on. Maybe the downtown golf course could have it's own exit off the new bridge highway, for example. (See, you can think of things like this when you have the leisure of winter hours to do your musing.)

What this plan needs in order to advance to the next level is a show of official support. Some elected officials have been kind enough to tell me privately they think this is a great idea. I say "kind," because in some cases I suspect the officials in question are working hard to say something nice rather than call me an idiot to my face. But, what with elections this year and all, they are being really, really nice.

If I were running for something, I'd be telling everyone that I support the downtown golf course. And I'd tell them this is a great idea, because it won't cost the taxpayers a dime. I don't know yet who's going to pay for it, but I'd use that won't-cost-the-taxpayers line as long as I could.

There are some big-time politicians who will be visiting Cape Girardeau between now and the primary in August and the general election in July. Quite frankly, I don't see how anyone could make a whistle stop here without mentioning the downtown golf course with a river view.

A couple of ministers have mentioned that the last thing they need is another golf course to lure members of their congregation on a bright and sunny Sunday morning. I think these parsons are missing a great opportunity for marketing. What if they told their parishioners there would be special tee times for all who attend services -- and preferred reservations for all tithers? See what I mean? This golf course can change a community in a lot of ways.

If I were a savvy county commissioner, I'd be asking the county surveyor to do a little field work around the Common Pleas Courthouse. Just how far out should that barge for the river hole be anchored? I know this will cause a little stir with barge traffic, but once you tell the pilots they get to play for free anytime they want, that shouldn't last too long.

As you can see, my winter has been a busy one. But all the great schemes of history have taken a little planning, and I'm glad I can do my part.

Keep those cards and letters and telephone calls coming. Remember, there is no such thing as a bad idea when you're talking about golf. I should know. I've heard most of them.

~R. Joe Sullivan is the editor of the Southeast Missourian and the founder (and, so far, the only member) of the World Famous Riverview Golf Club.