Fake news and no tweets from the president

Day 1: No tweets from President Trump.

The president holds an impromptu press conference in the White House Rose Garden, and apologizes for recent comments about illegal immigrants from Mexico. He agrees with some of his critics who have pointed out that legal aliens commit more crimes than undocumented immigrants. "I'm sorry if my previous comments have been out of order," the president said. "I will try to check my facts more closely in the future."

Day 2: No tweets from President Trump.

The president attends a prayer breakfast whose theme is charity, forgiveness and love of one's neighbors. The president, in brief, thoughtful remarks, says, "The Golden Rule is just as valid today as it ever was. Let us pray for those in need of any kind." An audience of representatives of most every religious group on Earth applauds for more than 10 minutes.

Day 3: No tweets from President Trump.

President Trump invites the Canadian prime minister to the White House where he offers a sensible trade deal to our neighbor to the north and asks Mexican trade representatives to take part in resolving some minor trade issues that will lead to a realistic revamp of the North American Free Trade Agreement. "President Trump has shown the way in these latest trade talks and has set an example of the way nations, particularly neighbors, should deal with one another," said Prime Minister Trudeau at the conclusion of the productive White House talks.

Day 4: No tweets from President Trump.

President Trump issues a blanket statement commending the so-called Russian probe and announces he stands ready to answer any and all questions at any time. Later, President Trump meets with Robert Mueller, after which they issue a joint statement that the talks were "extremely productive."

Day 5: No tweets from President Trump.

President Trump announces he has asked the National Rifle Association to compile a list of recommendations for curbing the manufacture and distribution of weapons that are frequently used in mass shootings. "I have made it clear that the gun lobby can either become part of the solution or face stern restrictions imposed by this administration."

Day 6: No tweets from President Trump.

President Trump announces he is forgoing his customary weekend golf outings in favor of holding sit-down sessions around the country to listen to the ideas and suggestions of a broad cross-section of Americans. "I hope these get-togethers will lead to useful and meaningful ideas that this administration can proudly promote in the weeks and months to come.

Day 7: No tweets from President Trump.

The White House press secretary announces that President Trump has closed his Twitter account. "Obviously, tweeting isn't the most presidential way of communicating to the nation, and to the world, the aims and objectives of this administration,' the press secretary says.

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Here's the deal: News media are, according to the Trump camp, making up fake news all day, every day, seven days a week. I thought to myself, "OK, why not?" I hope this week's worth of fake news helps slake your appetite for the bizarre.

By the way, if everything the news media report is fake news, then we can only assume that the widely reported election of Donald Trump was made up. Right?

Joe Sullivan is the retired editor of the Southeast Missourian.