Do you feel better?

Do you feel better?

Kind of had a scratchy-feeling throat for several days, but, with my sinus problems, I didn't really think anything about it.

But when I woke up on Sunday, my throat felt as if someone had used a sander on my tonsils and the back of my throat. Since I'm a diabetic with high blood pressure, I have to be careful what over-the-counter meds I take, so I stuck to ibuprofen and such. Got worse, so Marge hauled me to the doctor, given the problems with my lungs. The doctor said it wasn't in my lungs, and that it was a virus, so really nothing they could do. Bummer.

I got to thinking about all the home remedies Mom and Dad used when we were kids. We were more than 40 miles to the doctor, so you didn't go unless you were really sick and you had no other option. So before I went to bed the other night, we resurrected one of the old remedies from Mom and Dad. For a head cold or sore throat, Mom would grab the jar of Vic's and start smearing. It seemed like back then the jars were bigger, because these little jars they have now wouldn't have lasted but one cold. Mom would lather up your chest and your back. Then she would lather up your neck. Now you smelled like a Vic's factory. So I had Marge rub me down with Vic's and wrap an old handkerchief around my throat, and then I put on a T-shirt and went to bed. Dutchess, my dog, took one whiff of me and turned her rear end up toward me.

I didn't do the whole treatment Mom and Dad used. Dad would get a gallon coffee can -- they were metal back then -- add about an inch of water in the bottom and put it on the old gas cook stove. Then he'd drop a good dollop of Vic's in the can and bring it to a good simmer. Then he'd take a newspaper and make a funnel, big on one end so it would cover the top of the gallon coffee can and little on the other end so it would fit over your nose and mouth. Now you breathed in the Vic's vapor. After you had done this for awhile you got, say, a 1/8 to 1/4 teaspoon of Vic's to eat and swallow. Now you were ready for bed.

For a sore throat, you got pretty much the same treatment, but Dad would add his own remedy. He always had a fifth of Old Crow under the sink in case someone got sick. He'd fill a soup spoon or a tablespoon with sugar, then fill the spoon with Old Crow. Now you were ready to be cured. You didn't argue with Dad, so down the hatch it went. It burned from the moment it hit your tongue, back to where your throat was sore. Now it really burned. Then it burned clear down to your belly and then burned some more. The part I still remember was that the sugarcoated Old Crow didn't just slide down your throat. It kind of stuck back at the back and just sat there and burned. But it seemed to work.

Then at times Mom and Dad would take some Old Crow, some sugar and/or honey, a little lemon and some warm water and make a drink. They called it a "hot toddy." Wasn't bad. I kind of liked that. It was sure better than the Old Crow and sugar.

Dallas Kinder, a good friend of mine long gone, said his Mom, Mrs. Kinder, would make a kind of a little cloth bag and then tie it around his throat. Dallas said they'd put herbs and whatnots in the bag. He said it smelled awful. Part of the purpose was to ward off getting sick, but also to get well. Don't know if it worked. He said it was something like an "assphina" bag. Never did figure out exactly what he said, but I think he meant "asphidity" bag.

For cuts or scrapes, Mom would get out the Mercurochrome or the peroxide. The Mercurochrome -- when you put it on an open cut -- would make you stand up and pay attention. Boy, it hurt. Must have worked, because most everyone used it. Seems like Mom also had some plain iodine that she used. Lots of times Dad would take a cut or burn and just put some kerosene on it. Seemed to work.

While in junior college, I was working for a farmer south of McCook, Richard Klein, and he said he was cleaning out the barn when he was a kid and ran the pitchfork through his foot. He said it came out the bottom of his shoe. There was no one around, so he pulled hard enough to get the tine of the fork out of his foot. He said all he had was turpentine, so he filled a dropper with turpentine. He said he stuck the end of the dropper in the hole and squeezed. That was about when he said he couldn't remember one single thing. When he woke up, it still hurt, but it didn't get a bit sore. Must have worked. Lots of people used turpentine as a healing ointment.

Dad's No. 1 ointment was Absorbine. It was a smelly brown liquid liniment that was made for horses. It came in a dark brown bottle that was probably pint- or quart-sized. When I got older, they started to make an Absorbine Jr., but it was nothing like the real-deal horse liniment. You could pour some of that Absorbine on a cut and it felt like it burned the cut shut. Dad always had cracks in between his toes, so he'd pour that stuff on the cracks. I'll bet that was unreal. Once in awhile Dad would use it on us boys. I honestly think it works better than many of the products you can buy today. It was all natural, with no long, technical names for ingredients.

We always milked cows, and at one time or another the teats of those cows would get cracked and sore. So you treated them with Bag Balm. It came in a square can about 2x2x2, or it could've been 3x3x3. Dad would put the Bag Balm on before he milked. It made those teats so slick you could barely hang on to them. Mom and we boys put it on when we were done. Still use it today. Probably the best skin softener that has ever been made, bar none. When I think of it, I use it on my feet, which crack and get sore.

Hope you don't get sick, but, just in case!

Have a good one,

Until next time.