Be positive

Down through the years I've done quite a bit of marriage counseling. One of the topics we always covered was what type of friends each couple had. Did they have married and divorced friends? Were the married friends in successful, happy marriages? When they were around their friends, did it contribute to their marriage, or did it cause problems? What I wanted them to realize is whomever or whatever we surround ourselves with has an influence on us.

This applies not only to marriages, but to individuals as well. And it applies not only to our friends, but to outside influences, such as what we read, see, hear or even experience.

Back a bunch of years, I was reading a book by Richard Foster, and he wrote about how he noticed the daily news was influencing his daily life and, more specifically, his spiritual walk.

So he simply quit reading the newspaper. Because of his faith, he wasn't listening to the radio or watching TV. It was before Facebook and such. He took a lengthy break from the news.

In the past couple months, I've kind of kept track of what influences me. I watch the local news and the morning show with Matt Lauer, read the newspaper, check out Facebook, emails and phone calls, listen to the radio, etc. I have a group of family and friends I talk to on a regular basis. I see and visit with a number of people who come to the farmers market on a regular basis. All of these influence me to some degree.

For the past year, it seems like we have been bombarded with political ads, with virtually 99.99 percent of them very negative. One accuses one of this and that, and then the opposition does the same thing. Over and over and week after week of negative ads. News is the same. News sure isn't positive in any way. Those who protect us are getting shot. Roads are being blocked. There's story after story covering scandals and gossip. Shootings and robberies happen almost daily.

Is it any wonder our country seems like it is on a negative, hate-filled, violent course? It seems like a good percent of America is walking around ready to explode.

A month or two ago, a friend on Facebook posted something about wanting a more positive message on what she read and saw. Shari touched on a feeling I was having at the time. That was exactly what I wanted. So little by little, hopefully I have made some decisions that make my life more positive.

One thing I've done is unfriend or take off as much of the negative junk or posts as I can on my Facebook page. If on a continual basis the posts are negative and accusatory and a downer, then chances are you have been unfriended or you have become an acquaintance. I don't need or want that kind of stuff where I will see it on a regular basis. We have our times when everything goes wrong, and we dump on those around us. That's understandable. But that isn't all-the-time dumping. I try to make my posts positive and uplifting. Most of mine are about the garden or animals or canning or such.

Marge and I like to get up each morning and watch one of the early-morning news shows. Marge has her tea, and I have my cup of coffee. We watch Jim Burns and Crystal Britt and Brian Alworth every morning. They do a super job. It's a good, positive news program, but it's newsworthy. We decided to stop watching one of the national morning shows simply because of the content of their news items and the news team. We felt that the news content tended to be negative and quite biased. We don't plan on watching again until the news team leaves.

My favorite national news is RFD-TV news. We also exercise the right to use the "off" button. Some stuff is simply not fit to watch.

I enjoy our local newspaper. The Rusts have done a great job balancing the news with positive local events. There are times when the news is sad and a downer. But you can balance it out with a positive, feel-good piece. The Rusts do this.

Hopefully what I write lifts you up and doesn't tear you down. One of my favorite preachers is Joel Osteen. He is an encourager. Those who hear his message will most likely leave their church higher than when they came in. I hope my writings encourage you.

Most of my friends are upbeat and positive. Those positive kinds of people are fun to be around. I have a few friends who seem to live down kind of lives. I try to balance them out with encouraging friends.

There are times when I need to recharge. Usually it's when I'm tired and worn out. There are times when the heat has got the best of me, so I retreat. I lock the gate and spend time with my animal friends. I have my dog, Dutchess, who has a good day no matter what is going on. The only days when Dutchess has a bad day are when it's raining and she gets wet. Bummer.

Then when it gets hot, I spend some time at the picnic table, and Kittie Girl shows up. She is just happy all the time. Maybe you need a four-legged friend to lift your spirits.

Have I got it all figured out? No, by all means, I don't. There are days when I'm better just being alone. But I do know if something seems to bother me and drag me down, then I need to deal with it and lay it aside and go on.

Until next time.