Who are you?

By Rennie Phillips

Marge and I went to church Sunday morning. So after the service we went shopping since we needed some dog food. Well out in front of the store we bumped into a guy who said he had been wanting to meet me and he wanted to comment on my weekly article. Always makes me hesitate at that time whether the comment will be positive or negative. He proceeded to say he enjoyed the article.

But as we were talking he said his wife's name, but all I heard was the first part. My hearing isn't the best. Marge has been after me to get it checked, but after finding out the cost I'll probably just keep saying "Huh?" Anyway when he said his wife's name, I knew I'd met him years ago. Wasn't sure where or when, but I recognized him.

But it was 15 minutes later and we were miles from the store when my mind clicked and the pieces fell in place. I came home and had an old directory and found their names and even a phone number. Number didn't work and had been disconnected. Probably like us, we got rid of our land line years ago and now rely on cell phones. So now I turn to Facebook. I type in their name and up pops their picture. Yep they were the ones. His wife had helped me do some cooking years and years ago. Nice lady. Great cook. She baked cakes and pies and cookies and such in those electric portable oven deals. So I sent them a message and figured in time I'd get a response back, and I did.

I don't know how many times something like this has happened to me. I'll bump into someone and it's like we are best friends, but my mind is racing trying to figure out who and when and where. Or I'll bump into someone and they'll introduce themselves to me. My hearing is part of the problem here because there are times when I didn't hear the whole name. But most of the time, it's the way my mind works. I just can't remember names. If I can write it down and figure out a remembrance aid then I probably can. Otherwise it's gone. And not just kind of, but totally gone. Some have said to focus and pay attention. Doesn't work.

Couple three months ago, Marge and I went to a dinner sponsored by the Extension Office at Benton. While we were eating and then listening to the speakers, a guy at a table close to us introduced himself to me and commented on my articles. I always appreciate feedback whether it be positive or negative. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. Anyway he commented on how he liked my article, and we visited awhile. I had planned on remembering his name but "poof" it was gone. He acted like a nice guy and one I'd like to sit down with over a cup of coffee and just visit or enjoy the moment. I should have had him write it down for me.

One thing I try to do is tie them to a location. Maurice, a friend of mine who passed away, lived down east of Benton. Maurice described to me where he lived, the sandburs that grew down there, the trees around his shop and house and on and on. As he talked I got a mental picture of his house and his property. That I can remember. So I tied Maurice's name to the picture of his house. People probably think I'm snoopy when I ask where they live, but by getting a location I can remember their name and who they are better. I've always been that way even back in grade school. Pictures seemed to get stuck in my mind where obscure words were lost. At one time years ago I had the periodic chart fixed in my head. I could see the chart and the different elements. But this has escaped me as well.

Since I've got a cell phone with some memory, I now try to get their name typed into the memory on the phone. Or I have them call my cell and then I've got their number and I can then add their name. There are times when I'll just put their name in even if I don't have their phone number.

I don't know what is "right" in cases like this. I don't want to hurt their feelings by asking who they are. Sometimes it's the only way to fill in the blanks. Marge and I hauled some aluminum cans to the scrap metal place and one of the guys working there said I had married him and his wife like 16 or 19 years ago. I wouldn't have known him from Adam if he hadn't commented where we had met in the past. It wasn't that he and his wife weren't important, but it was simply the fact that time had dulled the memory. He'd grown a full beard which made it even harder.

Now on the other hand we used to fish a little lake up north of Hyannis for bass, bluegill, crappie and northern pike. Even though it has been almost 40 years ago since I last fished that lake I can tell you where to fish and what to use. I can even tell you the exact spot I caught some lunker and how deep the water was and what I was using for bait. I can tell you how warm it was and even how warm the water was.

All I know is we have brains that are simply awesome. And every time someone tries to tell me our brains happened by accident almost makes me want to laugh in their face. Our brains are wonderfully made to say the least. We might want to protect them a little better. Maybe put in more good stuff and leave some of the junk on the outside. Maybe fill them with good thoughts rather than negative harmful thoughts. Fill up a few spots with "precious memories" which is one of my favorite songs. Even consider what we eat and drink.

So if I bump into you somewhere don't be surprised if I don't remember. Probably be best if you just assume I won't remember and help me out. I kind of wish all my friends and people I bump into wore name tags.