BUCKING THE SYSTEM: PARTY WITH THE GIRLS MAKES UP FOR WORKING ON BIRTHDAY

There's nothing like a birthday celebration that involves your best girlfriends, a good fruit dip and some interesting underwear.

Today is my birthday, and unfortunately, both I and my husband are scheduled to work. Even worse, we're working long, erratic shifts, which means we've seen each other only sporadically all week and won't get to spend any quality time together until after Monday.

Not that he remembers that my birthday is today. We've known each other for some six years now, and Patrick's still not sure if my birthday is the 20th or the 21st.

Forget the fact that a major marker -- the vernal equinox, also known as the first day of spring -- falls on the 20th. He just can't get it right.

I think that's why my birthday present was given to me last week. Rather than scramble around at the last minute, Patrick waltzed into the house proud as a peacock last Wednesday and handed me a small, gift-wrapped box.

"Here's your birthday present," he said with a grin. "You have to wait until your birthday to open it."

He CLAIMS he wanted to see how I'd act trying to guess what was in the box, but I knew he just couldn't remember what day to give it to me.

Anyway, what he got me was an updated Mother-and-Child pendant to reflect the fact we now have two children. Now, you might be wondering how I'm able to write about my gift the day before my birthday.

The simple answer is this: I opened the present early, looked at my gift, then rewrapped it so Patrick wouldn't know. That's why he didn't get to see me in suspense.

While I won't get to spend time with my husband this weekend, I did ring my birthday in with some of my best girlfriends. We all went to a For Women Only party a few weeks ago, and we enjoyed ourselves so much we talked girlfriend Daniella into throwing a similar party last night.

There's nothing like a birthday celebration that involves your best girlfriends, a good fruit dip and some interesting underwear. Any of the three alone is a pleasant moment in time -- all of them at once is an unforgettable occasion.

Intimate apparel is one of the great equalizers among women. After we all admit that we've got to wear something and our menfolk occasionally like a little better than the sturdy cotton standard, we loosen up and enjoy unrestrained, slightly scandalized laughter.

That's when you realize that women don't often get to eat, drink and say what they want without wondering what everybody else is thinking about them. All too often, we try to be the prim untouchables who don't do or say anything that nobody else would do.

Well, my girlfriends have been letting me know differently lately. I realized that we were all alike at the last For Women Only party: We have similar stress centers, we like the same foods, and our bodies have the same trouble spots.

Whether our names are Tamara, Stephanie, Latoya, Daniella, Clorinda or Michelle, we are a lot alike. And when we stop holding back, we're even more alike. That's why we like each other.

I can't imagine a better birthday present from my best friends.

~Tamara Zellars Buck is a staff writer for the Southeast Missourian.